I just don’t get it to that extent somebody please explain
Since this is me, I will explain. I get emotional relief through physical pain. Does it hurt? Yes. Do I enjoy it? Not necessarily. Do I enjoy taking pain for my Sir? Yes. Do I experience a catharsis from it? Yes.
People play to their own limits. For me, I need to play heavy. Every day I hold myself together. I essentially manage an office, do my own work, make sure I know what my Sir needs each day, keep His children’s schedule in mind, keep His mother’s schedule in mind, assist with ceremonies for my religious family, keep the house clean, keep 2-5 people fed, etc. Every day I am a strong woman who puts others first.
Sometimes, I need to be beaten until He breaks down that strength, those walls, that need to KEEP IT TOGETHER. Without going that far, I cannot let go of the stress and emotions that need to be let out. It’s the one time that I can give over everything to Him and say “Protect me, Daddy. Make it okay for me to let go. Make me let go. Allow me to forget about all my responsibilities for a few moments.”
The heaviness of Oour play shows the strength that I have within me as well as the trust Wwe have in each other; it is this heavy in direct proportion to the intensity of both of those aspects.
^^^^^^^ this exactly. Thank you Sybil for saying it so well.